Kami, You're Annoying!
by FailingDemi
Summary: Kaoru never believed in anything spiritual, but that doesn't keep him from cleaning up a shrine! Now, the God wants to repay him back, but once Kaoru sees Kami he rejects him. What will Kami do? What will HIKARU do? FLUFF HikaKao,Etc. DISCONTINUED.
1. KAMISAMA HIKARU, COME ON IN!

A/N: Demi-kun here! Yesh. I made another story. So what? No one's gonna kill me for these. xD; Anyhoos, since some of my projects are almost to an end. -looks at Bubblegum Talk and Gone Misisng- I was thinking that I'd put up something!

I love spiritual settings, don't you?

WARNING: **This is an AU fiction and there is an eighty percent that characters could be OOC. Characters do not have relations with each other like the one in the manga/anime. Settings are changed.**

**This may become a parody, but right now it is set to humor. :P**

Disclaimer: I don't own Ouran Highschool.

WHEE-WOO-WHEE-WOO-

FUN-TIME!!

* * *

_Never once did I believe in 'God'. There is NO God in my world. Things happen scientifically and there's no frickin' spiritual happenings in this life of mine. Well. I don't believe in them. That's it. Why? There is no why. Science doesn't work that way._

_Nothing will change that opinion of mine. Anything that has to do with: ghosts, miracles, abnormal weather, spirits, and of course God- I don't believe. How many times do I have to say that? _

"Kami…are you done with that paperwork?"

The teenaged looking boy that was sitting in a white chair grinned, as he leaned back leisurely. "Of course, Kyouya. Always. Must you ask?"

The raven-haired teen blinked at the boy before turning towards the neat stacks of paper on the desk. "Not all the time, Kami. I know that you're very capable of completing this work on your own." He sighed, as he gathered the papers. "The foolish humans are at war…again."

"Isn't that so? Should I just kill them with an earthquake?"

"Don't. If you do, you are doing exactly what Tamaki would want," Kyouya sighed. He filed away the papers with the golden-eyed boy watching attentively. "That devil is up to no good, and it's your job to stop him from that."

Kami scoffed and ran his hand through his light-brown tresses. "Tamaki wouldn't dare."

The other just shrugged and dismissed himself from Kami's office with a nod. He stopped at the door and gave a glance at Kami, who was humming to himself. "However…be careful of his new advisor. I heard that she's quite good, if not devilish."

The god waved his hand to dismiss the topic. "Even so, Kyouya...Tamaki wouldn't dare."

"Underestimation…can lead to many things, Kami," Kyouya said in mild exasperation before leaving.

* * *

That same day…

Kami was no more.

* * *

"Why did this happen? Kami wasn't supposed to be inflicted," an elder complained. The angels around him murmured in agreement, while Kyouya just sat quietly in one of the chairs of the round golden table.

"Obviously, Tamaki had launched his attack," the advisor explained calmly, despite the provoked angel assembly. "And he was very tactful with this. We weren't expecting this sort of attack. We all knew that there were two forms of Kami in Kami."

He paused to make sure all eyes were on him.

"And with that last curse. Kami's halves…had been separated."

"Kami is the most supreme being! Why had he been inflicted with such a curse from Tamaki himself?!" one complained, raising his fists into the air. Another looked at him sharply and replied.

"You can't underestimate Tamaki. He may be stupid and dense, but he has a lot of power."

Another angel sighed and scratched his brown hair. He said a matter-of-factly, "Even though we still have one half here in heaven, the other half is gone. And the problem is that Kami can't remember what had happened to him…"

Kyouya crossed his arms and leaned back against the white chair. He sighed; eyes were twitching behind the glasses that he wore. The teen's hand massaged his temples, while he said annoyingly. "This was certainly uncalled for."

"Kyou-yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!"

Everyone glanced at the corridor, where a boy was prancing around energetically while waving his hands at said person. 'Kami' was dancing around with a huge smile on his face, while humming to himself stupidly.

Kyouya abruptly stood up from the table and growled, "Please excuse me." He stomped off towards the light-browned hair boy and grabbed him by his robes, dragging him out.

Never before had he gotten this much embarrassment, and in front of the Elders of the Angels. The boy in his grasp managed to wiggle out from his clutches and walk along side him, "Hey, Kyouya. What were you discussing with them? Usually, you're always in my office helping with the paper works! Aren't I Kami? Shouldn't I be in the assembly too?"

The advisor stopped in mid-walk and turned around to look at the teen. "Kami, please…don't ask-"

"Hikaru," he said quickly.

Kyouya blinked. "Pardon?"

"I'm Hikaru. I'm not named…Kami. Just Hikaru," he said with a smirk.

"Very well, _Hikaru_. We shall go back into the office now."

* * *

"Kyouya! I'm done with the papers, I'm going to take a stroll on earth," Hikaru called out, as he dashed out the door. Kyouya's eye retraced the steps in which the Supreme Being had ran, and then he looked at the desk.

Kyouya groaned and slapped his face with a hand. The papers were strewn all over the place, and were slipping onto the floor. The poor boy stooped down to collect the papers.

He mumbled.

"Side effects of the Halving Technique includes: high disorganization, increased immaturity, consistent emotional issues, idiocy, the need to prank innocent angels constantly, the necessity to skip work, the effort to do poorly and sloppily when creating new humans resulting in ugly and deformed babies, and of course…added work to Hikaru's advisor…"

Kyouya's shoulders slumped and his eyes blazed with fire. His glasses gleamed dangerously and he grumbled in malice, "I'm going to _**kill**_ you for this, Tamaki. Mark my words; I'm going to **slaughter** you."

"Kyouya, do you need help with that?" a low voice said, breaking him out of his thoughts. He looked up and met dark onyx eyes that were staring down at him boringly.

He sighed pitifully, "Do you always have to ask when you know the answer?"

"I assume that's a 'yes,'" the tall boy said quietly while bending over to grab the rest of the white sheets on the floor. After they were done, they had stood up, the new teenager was almost a feet taller then Kyouya.

"Thank you, Mori," he said gratefully, brushing the invisible dirt on his white robes. "If you're here looking for Hikaru, he just ran out a moment ago."

"Un," Mori hummed while turning towards the door. "Hikaru…doesn't need protection…does he?"

"Who knows. No demon in his right mind would attack Kami. Tamaki, no matter how much he loathes Hikaru, can't kill him because…well…he's God," Kyouya said. "It's a good idea to just watch the guy from afar."

"Yes, we should let Hikaru do what he wants for a while."

A sweat drop came onto Kyouya's head. "By doing that…" He took out a notebook and clicked his pens several times. "…it will result in twenty-four marble columns to be destroyed or cracked, an estimation of twenty mangled angels, and…the troublesome task of putting things back in order."

"And this all results from Hikaru's ability to wreak havoc."

SNAP

"My case is closed," he said professionally, while tucking the notebook underneath his arm. Mori blinked and then tucked his hands into his pockets.

"Aa."

_--Down_

_--at_

_-Earth…_

_**1. Do you believe in ghosts?**_

_No. Are you stupid, sensei?_ oo _What's with this test anyways?_

_**2. Is there a time in life where you have ever encountered anything spiritual?**_

_No, again. May I ask that question again, Maki-sensei? Are you an idiot by any chance? I really think so._

_**3. Have you any parents that are Buddhist?**_

_No._

_**4. "Miracles really do come true!" What do you say about that? Explain.**_

_Screw that to hell. No explanation needed. _

_**5. Will you like this class?**_

_Hm. Probably not. I don't even know what this 'class' exists for._

A boy tightly shut his eyes after he had written the last answer. His eyes were sore, and his muscles were aching. Reason why? No reason…he felt so damn tired for some reason. He reopened his eyes and tapped his finger against the desk.

School was really stupid. Even though he was just a boy studying abroad to attend a normal high school, Hitachiin Kaoru couldn't help but feel that this school, Ourin, was too…_stupid_ for him.

He sighed and cradled his face with his hand.

Ouran High School was the perfect place to go and to study. Except, he couldn't stand those rich bastards over there. Yes, he was contradicting himself because of 'Hitachiin' that was attached to his name.

He was just an orphan in the first place, adopted by the owners of the leading clothing design. Kaoru…insisted that he was a normal teenager, and so he denied luxury living and persisted to live by himself in a rented apartment while studying in a normal school…far…far…far…far…away from home. (Or the Hitachiins for that matter.)

"All done with the test?" a woman asked, breaking the long silence. The golden-eyed boy had to ask himself: Was that really a test?

He passed his papers forward and sighed for the umpteenth time as the woman, Maki, strolled around to collect the examination sheets. A deep scowl came on his face when he observed one of his classmates fumbling with his pen.

'In a stupid school, indeed.'

"Thank you very much for completing this quiz," Maki said kindly, bowing ever so slightly with every word she says. "Since this is history class, we shall study about our town's past. Lots of religion is involved, so those who are religious may find this a very easy course to pass."

Since Kaoru didn't want to focus on his teacher's rather hideous looking face, his eyes turned towards the windows.

He could see rectangular stones jutting out from a distance, and many trees surrounding the roadside.

Kaoru had noticed very recently that Ourin was built in a district with many temples and grave yards. He came with this conclusion that this area was pretty religious, and he decided not to feel pitiful of himself that he was stuck in this school.

'How I wish I was in Ouran…'

* * *

The school bell rang.

Glorious music to Kaoru's ears!! He couldn't wait to run home and escape from this school. All they seem to ever talk about was either: fashion (girls), tests (girls and boys), sports (girls and boys), and strange nightmares and ghost sightings (geeks and nerds).

Kaoru let out a tired sigh, as he was pushed along the crowd of students. The many students of the school emptied out of the school building and onto the grounds outside of the school.

The fifteen year old stood on the vast concrete lot and looked up into the sunny afternoon sky. School was over, and he could get out from this wretched place-

"Hitachiin!"

"…Huh?" He turned around to see some of his classmates waving at him. They were mostly girls, and what's strange was that they had a blush on their faces.

"We'll see you tomorrow!" one said, while the giggling girls walked away. Kaoru feigned a smile and waved back, bidding them goodbye. He kept his smile up until they were gone, and he walked away towards the gates.

"Girls…" he scoffed, as he walked out of the school grounds. He slung his backpack over his shoulders and started to stroll into a solitary pathway that led to his apartment. Kaoru appreciated the lone silence, so that he could think.

There were no roads next to that piece of pathway, only a steep concrete slope leading to a water way. Kaoru deemed it very peaceful.

This path was most respected because of the lack of people that traveled this way-

BING, BING!

Kaoru turned his head towards the source but immediately was greeted by a flight of bikes running his way. He fell flat on his bottom, narrowly missing being run over by the gang. He heard the bikers laughing at his fall, and soon they were gone.

He rubbed his head and frowned. How troublesome.

* * *

Hikaru had appeared down at earth and admired its beauty of trees. He walked down the concrete sidewalk and enjoyed the sun's rays sparkling over the water's surface. The breeze played with the tree's leaves, and he closed his eyes.

After walking in unbroken serenity, Hikaru opened his eyes to see a sign built ahead. He scurried to the sign and saw that there was a pathway leading to a small wooden hut. Judging by the many papers that hung there…

"A shrine!" he chirped, running onto the pebble-covered grounds. The teenager had this smile as he observed how neat and kept the shrine was. Hikaru nodded in approval. This was by far the most beautiful spot that he had ever seen!

Crunching of gravel caught his interest, and he turned to see five boys riding bicycles come to a stop right before him. "Wha?" he asked, as the teens parked their bikes. Hikaru watched each of them get off and bring a white plastic bag with them.

"Are you sure no one's going to catch us here?" one asked, as the leader walked up to the door.

"This is a shrine…who's going to find us here?" another asked. They shifted the door open and stepped inside of the wooden house, and they didn't bother cleaning their shoes with the rug outside. "Besides, I heard this shrine has been abandoned for many years! Hardly anyone comes in and cleans it up."

This struck Hikaru hard, as he floated into the hut. The boys took out boxes of beer and cigarettes, and they snickered to themselves.

"D-D-Despicable! This is my shrine, how dare you do these things here!!" Hikaru accused, his eyes furrowing into anger at the five teenagers. However they didn't seem to hear him and they had their little drinking party, despite Hikaru's protests.

* * *

"Let's blow this joint," one said after a pretty long half an hour. Hikaru's eyes grew wide. Were they going to bomb his shrine now?! His golden orbs began to rim with tears, as he watched a boy kick a beer bottle against the altar.

"Yeah, let's leave," another said. The pear that he had eaten and stolen from the altar was thrown aside and left to rot on the side of the shack. Kami was truly hurt by their actions and sank onto the floor looking at the destruction they had caused.

His 'food' was bitten, taken, and strewn all over the floor. Empty bottles and caps were lying next to the ashes and cigarette bits. Other than everything, it looked completely horrendous.

How could they disrespect Hikaru? He had given those measly people souls and he had made sure they had a good life! And their sign of thanks were: walk inside a Kami's shrine and trash it.

How wonderful.

"Kyouya! Human beings are meanies!!" he cried, tears were threatening to fall from his eyes. And usually when that would happen…

A slight drizzle started to set outside.

* * *

A water droplet fell onto Kaoru's face, startling him from his airy thoughts. Kaoru stopped in his paths and looked up at the sky. It was as clear as any day, but the weird part was that it was raining.

He blinked and held out his hands to confirm that it was truly drizzling.

What did he get from that?

PLSH

His white t-shirt was being dotted with darker spots, and he blinked before briskly running. The rain seemed to become harder, and so he ran faster. He was then running to search for the nearest place to take shelter from the rain.

And that was where he saw it. Kaoru stopped in front of the shrine. Without a second thought he ran inside of the hut, and calmed down his breathing. The first thing that greeted him once he was inside was…

Smoke.

Kaoru smelled smoke, and also he smelled the stinging smell of alcohol. That was when he saw it, the shrine looked like it was a place to party. He slowly walked around it, inspecting the damage that was done. "Jeez…some people don't know how to respect shrines…"

Hikaru, who had been watching from the moment he walked in, nodded in agreement. The spiritual figure watched as Kaoru picked up a plastic bag nearby and placed in the bottles. "Drinking beer…and in a shrine too," Kaoru muttered.

The bystander wiped his eyes free of the tears and sniffled, as the place slowly became clean.

Kaoru grabbed the bag full of bottles and dumped it in a trashcan outside of the hut. He turned back and looked inside; he shrugged. 'That's about how much I can do…'

"M-My savior!" Hikaru cried joyfully, hopping onto his feet. "Thank you so much! I can't express my hap--H-Hey! Where are you going? Can't you hear me?"

Obviously, Hikaru forgot that humans can't see any spirits.

"Really disrespectful...even if God doesn't exist," he mumbled, with an apathtic face on. Kaoru turned to leave, his bag over his shoulders. He decided to leave and go home, but he didn't know that Hikaru was tailing along after him.

* * *

"Are you ignoring me?" Hikaru thought out loud, as he followed Kaoru home. The human boy felt someone following him, but didn't dare to turn around and discover who. Besides…there was NO SUCH THING AS GHOSTS.

"I'm going to thank you!" the god exclaimed, throwing his hands up into the air. "I'm god, so I can give you anything you want!"

Silence.

Kaoru continued walking back to his apartment, he tried to ignore the weird sensation of chills that were sent along his back. Perhaps paranoia? He sighed and told himself that ghosts and spirits don't exist, even though he was walking right next to a cemetery.

"Uhh…please listen to me! I'm trying to repay you! No good deed goes by me unnoticed!" Hikaru continued. He stopped in his tracks when a wisp of smoke flew in his face. It materialized into a teenager who had a knife stuck on his head.

"Y-Y-You're KAMI?!" it exclaimed. Hikaru jumped back, his eyes wide in horror. "TURN ME BACK INTO A HUMAN!!"

"W-What, but I can't! Or…I don't know how!" the God protested, shaking his head frantically. "Kyouya has to make the decision!" His eyes traveled to Kaoru who was at the point of turning a corner. "W-WAIT!"

He shoved the dead boy aside and ran towards his target while waving his hands frantically.

"I STILL HAVE TO REPAY YOU!!"

* * *

Kaoru let out a deep sigh as he opened the door to his small apartment. How great it was to be at home! He collapsed onto the sofa and stared at the ceiling. He deserved a long soak in the hot springs downstairs.

Although winter had melted long time ago, spring was still cold. Besides, Kaoru thought that he might want to relax his tired brain and muscles at the hot springs. Yeah. Take a long bath.

* * *

Kaoru peeked into the indoor men's bath. No one was there, not at the moment. He liked bathing alone and didn't want people to contaminate the water. (How sanitary, yet insulting...) With a towel wrapped around his waist, he made his way to the steamy waters of the hot springs.

The waters were rimmed with smooth rocks that led to the surface, and he sat down on a rock and soaked his foot in. Kaoru glanced around to see if there was anyone there, before he started to kick the hot water playfully.

Hikaru floated in and stared around; he acknowledged a large bamboo wall that was to the far left of the room. And…aha!

"You must be Kaoru! I remember creating you!" Hikaru said, putting his face in front of said person's. Kaoru only sighed tremendously and soaked another towel in the water before bringing it up to wipe his face. "Yes! You were my...er...wait a minute, did I even create you?"

Kaoru continued kicking the water.

Hikaru pouted. "Please, don't ignore me!"

The non-believer let his thoughts float, and not once paid attention to the possibility that a God was speaking to him. Hikaru frowned, and walked into the water, not at all getting wet. He stared sternly up at Kaoru, who /seemed/ to be staring back.

"Can you please listen to me for once?" Hikaru demanded.

Silence.

He jutted a finger at Kaoru, but he didn't flinch. "This is God! I COMMAND YOU TO LISTEN!"

"I wonder what I should make for dinner tonight..."

"I'm trying to talk to you, and you start talking about **food**!!" Hikaru's eyes were threatening to pop out.

"Hm, I think I'll have to stock up on food."

Hikaru slapped his face, and shook his head. "Okay, you either listen to Kami, or suffer!!"

Silence.

Out of impatience, the God took a firm grasp of Kaoru's foot and tugged him sharply into the steaming hot water.

SPLASH

Kaoru surfaced for air, and blinked the water from his eyes. How the heck could he have fallen in? He was staring at the rock with disbelief. Kaoru was just sitting there as peaceful as can be, and someone PULLS him into the water.

No...he couldn't have fallen in. He was sitting on a flat rock! FLAT!

One word struck him in his head.

'Pervert!'

Kaoru dunked his head underneath the water to search for the perpetrator, but found no one underneath there. He resurfaced and glanced around, sharp golden eyes scanning around the room, searching through the mist.

Hikaru, on the other hand, was not impressed. He was just standing in front of Kaoru, and he couldn't even see him! Why does this human insist on ignoring **God**? Hikaru was getting pretty impatient with this, and he crossed his arms with a scowl on his face.

_-Up_

_--at_

_--Heaven_

"Where's Hikaru?" Kyouya asked, after waiting for an exceedingly long time. His raven eyes stared into Mori's back as he blinked out of his thoughts. They were leaning against the railings of a grand staircase, overlooking the gates where Hikaru was supposed to enter a long time ago.

"No idea."

Kyouya's head turned back to the gates and he said. "I see. So we let him run around for a long time without knowing where he was."

Mori nodded stiffly. "It seems so."

The teenager closed his eyes and pushed up his glasses earning a shine. He said in a suppressed seething tone, "And…he may have already caused some trouble..yes…"

"Always expected from Hikaru."

"Will it be alright that we fetch him from Earth?" Mori asked, after a terribly long silence. Kyouya's mouth twitched upwards into a murderous smile and he stopped himself from exploding into anger.

"Such a wise decision, Mori. As expected from Hikaru's bodyguard."

"…Not to put down your opinion, but it seems like we're more like…babysitters…in my opinion," Mori said wistfully. The pen in Kyouya's fingers cracked and it became a fist. His eyes twitched and he robotically turned to Mori.

"You know what? I agree 100 percent."

* * *

A/N: Like always...hrm. Hikaru's God, Kyouya's advisor, Mori's body-guard, and Kaoru's the human who God is trying to repay. But then...who's Tamaki? And...does this story even have a plot?

I dunno. I was only setting up a scenario and stuff, I swear the next chapter will be more better. ;)

-Ja!

...Oh yeah! I have to scrounge for reveiws.

...Ahem. Please!! I...want reveiws!! ;-; Even though you're lazy, drop by some kind of reveiw or something. Pwease? o.o I beg of thee. Because this authoress needs reveiws to boost inspiration. :D


	2. Human Meets God

A/N: Woo. I got this dun! -cheers- Anyways. I realized how OOC Hikaru was. (Didnt I notice long time ago?) And I toned down his stupidness. Don't worry, the plot coms soon...I just need to introduce all the characters. -sighs-

I must say I enjoyed writing this, so anyways...have a happy reading!

Many thanks to my awesome beta, **Capiorcorpus**!

Disclaimer: I don't own Ouran Highschool Host Club.

* * *

"Kaoru."

Silence.

"Kaoru. This is God speaking."

Hikaru stared at him with a frown, as Kaoru now lay on the bed doing homework. He was not acknowledging the Kami whom followed him home, and was now tapping an orange pen against his cheek in a thoughtful manner.

"I think it's supposed to be 1754…" he muttered to himself, furrowing his eyebrows. Hikaru was flabbergasted, and he sat on the floor staring at Kaoru like a lost dog. Never before had he been this neglected!

Everyone in heaven always and always paid attention to him! Mori always brought him chocolate whenever he requested for it, and Kyouya would always make sure that his paper work was done, however he seemed pissed at times, but WHATEVER.

"I'm going to destroy you with lightning if you will not listen," Hikaru said with furrowed brows, as he jutted a finger at Kaoru. The human only looked up at the ceiling and then scribble something down on the piece of paper.

This Kami is getting pissed. How could he ever make this person notice him?

Kaoru sat up and stared out the window to his room. Things had always been quiet; however today…he felt like someone was there with him. He scratched his head and stood up, and he walked past Hikaru and out the door.

"Hah? You ignore me and now you're leaving?"

No answer. The god stood up and followed after; he located Kaoru standing in the kitchen looking through his fridge. Kaoru felt his stomach growl, and he reached for a juice carton. Feeling absolutely lazy, he opened it and chugged it down.

"…Hello?" Hikaru questioned, venturing up close to the person who was drinking a carton of orange juice.

He waved a hand in front of Kaoru.

No response.

"Ahem, he can't hear you, Hikaru."

He turned around to see two figures standing before him, looking at them with accused glares. Well one of them was glaring at him, and that was behind his spectacles. "You should have known that…before you did anything else. It was clearly in your studies, and judging by your actions, you hadn't paid attention to it."

"By the way, you're not supposed to be on Earth."

"Well, do my paperwork for me."

The pen in the raven-head's hand cracked slightly, and he said through gritted teeth, "Kami is not supposed to be lazy or anything else, Hikaru. That is your duty. And unfortunately for you, I don't do your dirty work."

He chewed on his lower lip and then glanced hopefully at the tall and quiet man. "...Mori?"

"I apologize, but I believe that I'm a bodyguard."

Cough.

All three divine people stared at Kaoru who was rubbing his mouth with his large white sweater sleeve, and he placed the open carton back inside of the fridge. Hikaru's stare at Kyouya and Mori intensified. "But I have to repay that human for the noble deeds he had done!"

Kyouya rubbed his temples and replied, "Hikaru, you can do that in heaven. You have duties up there…"

Stare.

"…What did this…human do exactly?"

"He fixed up my shrine!"

"Not import-"

"Code 1342 belonging in the 34th category of the Book of Jinsei…If angel or divine being is indebt to a human, they are not allowed to leave the Earth until it is repaid," Hikaru grinned, as he held up the peace sign.

"HAH! IN YOUR FACE!! I STUDY!"

"Where's the mayonnaise?"

Hikaru sighed and turned to look at Kaoru who had begun cooking his dinner. "This human is really kind, Kyouya. I MUST do what the rule says, because it's not just a rule, it's applied. You can't drag me to heaven, because the rule makes it impossible to do so."

He grinned cheekily.

"…What is so important about this human that makes you so stubborn to stay?" Kyouya questioned, furrowing his eyebrows at the teen standing in front of him. Hikaru looked at Kaoru, and blinked at him.

Kaoru just sighed, as he scratched his head. A small tint of pink came onto Hikaru's face and he smiled stupidly. "He has this kind of air about him that makes me all warm and floaty…"

'Warm…and floaty?'

"But, I can guarantee you that he is very nice!"

Kyouya for once took the time to glance at the 'human' that Hikaru was so much talking about. His eyebrows raised and he stared at the human boy. Kyouya had to take off his glasses and wipe it with his white sash around his waist before putting them on again.

"…Unbelievable…"

"Yes, that's quite astonishing," Mori input. Hikaru whipped around with this grin on his face.

"Yes! He can cook!"

Kyouya and Mori glanced at each other. Kyouya pushed up his glasses while crossing his arms, he muttered under his breath, "Not about his cooking..."

"So what do you say, my friend?" he asked cheekily, putting an arm around Kyouya. He poked his advisor's cheek several times and sniggered, "I'm not going to provoke Tamaki anymore, and if that's not enough, I won't set traps around heaven."

Kyouya stood in silence, and pushed off Hikaru.

"Nice try, but no."

"Kyouya…" Mori said. He scratched his forehead with his index finger and said thoughtfully. "Just helpfully inputting-…if Hikaru stopped his antics, perhaps the angels could actually carry out their jobs in answering prayers…"

"Just _helpfully_ inputting…"

"See? Mori thinks it's good," Hikaru said, grinning slyly at them. "Oh…and remember the important fact: **I won't provoke Tamaki anymore**."

'That…is an offer that I can't pass up…'

"Judging by the look on your face, you can't pass the offer up."

"But there proves to be a problem, oh great Hikaru," Kyouya said sarcastically. "Look at that human."

He turned around stared and looked back. "What about him?"

"Do you…recognize that boy?"

Hikaru scrutinized the teen by walking closer to Kaoru. He looked and inspected his face, and walked around him. The golden-eyed God turned back to Kyouya was with a blank and clueless face on. "Nope! Am I supposed to see something?"

"It's nothing…" Kyouya sighed in defeat. "If you are so stubborn to repay him…" He strode over to Kaoru, and placed a hand on his head; Kaoru didn't flinch or acknowledge the presence of someone touching his head. "I'm giving him the ability to see spirits. It won't be activated until we leave…"

"Does that mean you're doing my work for me?" he asked hopefully.

"Nope."

"…What kind of advisor are you?"

"What kind of God **are** you?"

"Oh…and make sure you repay him quickly, Hikaru." He looked at Hikaru. "Lying to the elders is one thing that I hate doing." He calmly walked to Mori and patted him on the shoulder, indicating him to leave. Before fully disappearing, he said darkly to the divine being. "Be aware of demons and monsters down here."

SHP

And they were gone.

Kaoru had a slight shiver as he was eating his food. He chewed slowly as he stared at the kitchen. He stood up from the table, the chair eerily screeching. He wasn't supposed to feel paranoid or anything, because he had always been alone in his apartment.

'Why do I feel like there's an ugly monster waiting to devour me when I turn around?' he thought to himself. It's probably just a feeling, Kaoru told himself. He brought the dishes to the sink and left it there with yesterday's dishes.

Kaoru stretched and walked past Hikaru, stalking off to his room.

Wait.

He stopped.

Looked back.

Blink.

Blink.

Wide eyes.

Rub eyes.

Look back.

"Wait…a minute…"

"You can see me?" he asked hopefully.

Kaoru just stared with wide eyes.

He smiled, and extended a hand to him. He chirped, "Great! I'm Hikaru, nice to meet yo-"

THUD

"_Hey_!"

* * *

Hikaru was staring at Kaoru who had been lugged to his bed after he had fainted. Now what caused this human to faint? Was it the lack of oxygen in the room?

'Now that I think about it, Kaoru hardly has any plants here, and never opens the windows…' Hikaru stood up. Maybe he could help by getting some plants for him. Yeah, Hikaru should do that. He stood up from the floor and walked outside, glancing around at the empty place.

'Sure seems lifeless around Kaoru's house…' Hikaru thought. 'There's so much brown…'

* * *

By the time Kaoru woke up it was in the middle of the night. He sat up from bed, and the futon covering his body had slid off.

He was troubled…_oh so deeply_ _troubled_.

Why did he see someone who looked exactly like him anyways?

Maybe someone played a prank on him, and placed his mirror there. Kaoru's eyes wandered to the mirror standing next to the table on its wooden legs. But then again, if you really think about…really, really hard…

No one else had walked in on him.

…Nor…

Can mirrors stand up and walk to the living room.

However, if mirrors possess that certain ability, how could the doppelganger reach out his hand and smile…and…and…-

_SPEAK_!

How can mirrors speak? Kaoru was almost tempted to look for a book about inanimate things or call up a professional scientist and ask: Yo, there was a mirror in front of me and it told me its name was Hikaru. Please explain how it can communicate.

'I wonder how many people will hang up…'

Kaoru stood up from the bed and took a stretch; he slouched again and randomly scratched his cheek. 'How did I get onto the bed anyways?'

His mind flashed back to the clone of himself, and he shook his head, as if that would help him lose that thought. Kaoru walked to the door and opened it, his eyes closed irritably. 'Maybe, I need a break from-'

"Oh, Kaoru, you're awake?"

Kaoru stared, and it took every ounce of willpower to refrain from screaming his head off and call the police.

"Okay…I'm going to ask you two-no three things," Kaoru said, stepping back from the clone that had just appeared. Hikaru blinked and waited patiently, while the human teen breathed in deeply. "Alright…one: Who the hell are you and why do you have my face?"

"…I'm Hikaru, your average God. And your face? You still have your skin; it's not like I ripped off your face or anything…"

"Disturbing, but whatever," Kaoru dismissed the topic with a wave of his hand. However…he had to raise an eyebrow as he ignored Hikaru's outstretched hand. "Average…God?"

"Yeah, I'm your creator. The God of everything."

"Hahaha, I find that strangely amusing. How the hell could someone your age joke around anyways?," Kaoru snorted, as he crossed his arms. "Okay, question number two: What the hell did you do with my living room?"

Hikaru blinked and smiled at the things in the living room. "You know your apartment was so brown, and you probably fainted because of the lack of oxygen! So I was thinking that maybe a few plants would be alright."

Kaoru's golden eyes traveled around the whole room, and he scoffed. "A few? A _FEW_?! You call this a few? Dude, whatever your name is, this. Is. A. Massive. Jungle!" He made his point by pointing his fingers at the vine and tree covered furniture.

"_And why the hell did you plant an apple tree in the middle of my coffee table?" _

"Isn't it nice?" Hikaru said with a large smile. He dusted his hands onto his white pants. "I spent so much work on that tree! And soon enough--" He tossed his hands into the air. "We'll have apples!"

"…Burn it."

"Wait, what? _Why_?"

"My landowner is going to skin me alive if she finds all this growth in one of her apartment room…" Kaoru mumbled, as he made his way to the vine covered couch. He collapsed on it listening to the leaves underneath him rustle slightly. He saw Hikaru look at him with a blank face.

"Isn't it good though?"

"**No."**

Hikaru's eye twitched. '…ungrateful little human.'

"What was that last question you wanted to ask? Was it how I got an apple tree here? I mean, you were out cold for several hours. You are bound to ask how I got such gigantic vegetation in your room in just three hours, am I correct?"

"Actually, I've been wondering who the heck you are."

"Are you going to ask that?"

Kaoru crossed his arms, and his eyebrow twitched. "No…I'm going to save my breath on you, and ask you very kindly…"

Hikaru clapped his hands together and smiled. "What is it?"

"**Get out of my house."**

-Cricket chirp.-

The whole apartment had turned quiet. Kaoru had a firm edge to his stare, and his finger was pointed to the door. Hikaru looked at Kaoru, and then at the door, back to Kaoru, and then to the door.

"But…" Hikaru said, a bit put off by Kaoru's blunt and direct answer. "I'm from heaven; I don't have anywhere else to go."

"I don't care. _Leave_."

"Hey! I **GAVE** you life, and this is what you do to your God?" Hikaru huffed.

"There was never a God in the first place, now leave, or else I'll call the police!"

"Police?" he tilted his head slightly and bit on the tip of his index finger. "Whazzat?"

"Hahaha, you better not kid with me," Kaoru said warily. He was beginning to think Hikaru was a psycho. Several sweat drops slid down his forehead. "If you don't leave, I'm going to personally drag you out, and take you to the station."

"Ah! Police! You mean those funny little humans who run around in their whistling cars?" Hikaru asked, his eyes lit up and he snapped his fingers at the realization. Kaoru stared. He couldn't believe it. Hikaru was so…so…

Stupid!

Kaoru jumped up from the couch and grabbed Hikaru by the arm. He started to march to the door with Hikaru, surprisingly, coming along. The god stuttered in surprise, "H-Hey, where are you taking me?"

"Outside."

"Where?"

K-chak.

Kaoru gave Hikaru a stare, and flung him out the door. "Wai-"

SLAM

Click.

The adopted Hitachiin walked back towards the living room. He could hear poundings on the door and cries of protest from the person he kicked out. Kaoru sighed as he collapsed on a couch.

'Today's one hectic day,' Kaoru thought. He sat in silence and listened as the rain began to pour.

He stood up and walked towards his room, closing the lights on his way. Kaoru ruffled his hair messily and collapsed onto the bed, and blinked at the mirror which was in his line of view. 'That clone…he seemed very real...could it be? No. I don't remember having a twin,' Kaoru told himself, while burying his face into a pillow.

'But I'm an orphan…'

He let out a huge sigh and sat up; he leaned against the wall and peered up at his empty wall. Kaoru chuckled softly to himself, "Nah…that guy's just a dream. And when I wake up the tree and growth in my house will be gone."

Kaoru sat there and closed his golden eyes. He listened to the pit and pat of the rain against his window, and he was about to nod off to sleep.

* * *

There was Hikaru.

Climbing a tree.

Getting splashed and wet by nature's force.

He was God, dammit! God wasn't supposed to be struggling to just climb a tree, and why the heck was nature throwing rain at him?!

Hikaru grunted as he flung another limb up the tall tree. His white robes were hanging on his body, dripping with water. His pant legs were practically covered with mud and all the disgusting things found on the ground.

He heaved himself onto a branch and looked up to see a light shimmering two floors above him. That must be Kaoru's room, Hikaru thought. He felt something crawl up his leg.

"Eh?" he looked down at his pant leg. And-

"OMFGZ!#!!" Hikaru screamed; his eyes widened as a small earthworm inched its way up his leg. Something flapped to his shoulder, and he turned his head slight to see who it was.

"_Good morning, mister. Would you like me to eat that?"_

"_He's evil! Don't let him eat me!"_ the worm screamed back. Hikaru looked at the bird sitting on his shoulder and then at the worm on his leg.

"_C'mon, you're Kami!"_ the pigeon chirped, ruffling its feathers. _"You made this food product for me to eat!" _

"But then I made the worm for decomposition…"

"_Yeah!" _the worm argued.

Hikaru bit his lower lip uncertainly, and gently picked up the worm. He stared at the limp thing hanging from his fingers. Hikaru narrowed his eyes and asked, "Can you survive being flung far, far away?"

"_Yes…why?"_

In a flash, Hikaru threw the thing away from him, and watched the organism go farther and farther away. The bird let out a squawk in disdain and frustration. _"Why in your name did you fling away my breakfast?!"_

"If you want I can get you some food, but not right now," Hikaru said, as he stood up from the branch. He grabbed the sides of the trunk and started to crawl upwards by grabbing it rashly with his fingers. "But right now, I have a mission to get into that apartment."

"_Eh, really now?"_ it sang in his ear. _"I'm your creation, by the way."_

"Yeah. I'm not stupid," Hikaru grunted as he continued climbing up. He was starting to get pissed at the bird chirping in his ear, but God could not get angry…or could he? Finally he reached the floor in which he wanted to get on.

Hikaru huffed and fell limp against the branch. "Dammit, climbing a tree looked so easy when the bears, termites and animals climbed it…"

"_Hey, it's harder than that, big boss."_

"Oh shut up," he hissed tiredly while getting onto his feet. He looked up and saw the light shimmering through the glass. Rain slid down his head and his hair, and he stretched his hand until it could bend slightly over the window. "Oy, birdie, do me a favor."

"_What?"_

"Fly up there and unlock the window."

"_Can I do that?"_

"Yes, I have faith in you."

"_No, I mean. Can I __**DO**__ that?"_

"…Uh…beak power?"

In a second, the bird flew up onto the window. Hikaru waited patiently until he heard an audible click. And then the bird squeaked, _"All ready, boss."_

"Great," he muttered, before he jumped from the branch and onto the window. Half of his body was dangling precariously, and he shoved the window open, flinging his foot inside.

* * *

Tap, tap.

Click

Kaoru's eyes traveled to the window in curiosity, and he thought that the bird looked strange. A hand crept on his windowpane, and in a flash the window opened. "KAORU! YOU'RE NOT GETTING AWAY!!"

"YOU AGAIN?!" Kaoru exploded, immediately jumping off the bed. Hikaru wiggled in and plopped on the floor in a heap of mess. "DIDN'T I SLAM THE DOOR IN YOUR FACE AND LOCK IT?!"

"Well, I climbed through your window," he said, crossing his arms in triumph. The human only gaped at the person who had all of his clothes sag on his body. He was dripping on his floor too!

"_And I helped him!"_

"Okay, go away. I don't need you," Hikaru muttered boringly at the bird that was flying around him in circles. The thing made a motion which seemed like a shrug and flew out the open window.

"Are you talking to yourself?" Kaoru asked, putting a hand on his hip. The wet teen looked at Kaoru with a smile.

"No, I was talking to that bird," Hikaru informed him with a wag of his finger. "Ah wells, as long as I'm here...Anyways, my dear little creation, you can't just KICK me out. No matter how hard to try to shoo me out, I can always float back in."

"You climbed up a window."

"Yes, that too."

Kaoru sighed in frustration and flopped onto his bed. He closed his eyes tiredly, before muttering, "Hey…"

"Hmm?"

"Tell me. Who ARE you?" Kaoru said tiredly. He looked up at Hikaru with his golden orbs. "And why are you following me?"

* * *

A/N: Woosh. Bad place to end. I agree. It sucks. ARGH! Anyways. I'll have to finish it soon. My brain cannot hold a lot of ideas. Unfortunately I have a lot of ideas. -faints-

Anyways, please reveiw:D Thank you!

-Until next time...

--Demi-kun


	3. Human Meets Devil

A/N: It's updated...And I think I went crazy here...:D Er...hehe?

As well...Thanks so much to rini anointed436! She really helped me A LOT on this, even gave me ideas for the plot ahead! So I'd like to dedicate this chapter to her. Thanks so much!

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Beta'd by Capiorcorpus

* * *

"Who…am I?" Hikaru asked, as he looked at Kaoru. The human seemed to be staring at him intensely; he was obviously stressed. "I told you, I'm a god."

Kaoru bit his lower lip and almost chucked a pillow at him, but instead he smashed his fist against the pillow. He murmured at Hikaru, "I have no need to have someone posing as me here. Just get out of my sight…please."

Hikaru flinched as Kaoru sharply turned away from him. He sighed dejectedly and looked around trying to locate a place where he could stay. His eyes landed on another door and he walked through it.

'…Comfy,' Hikaru thought looking around at the dark area. He felt things cushioning him softly, and he sat back, staring at Kaoru through the darkness and through the closet. He could see the human daze off to sleep, forgetting to shut the lights.

Hikaru raised a finger and lowered it, and the room light dimmed. That was the least he could do for the human; if that accounted as a repayment, Hikaru would have left. However something told him to stay in that closet and near Kaoru.

He just felt complete around him.

_--In the depths of Hell…_

"Mm…well what do we have here? Am I seeing double?" a blonde asked himself, watching a large screen before him. He leaned back against his reclining chair and sighed, as he played with a strand of blonde hair. "Two of that bratty god?"

"So, is this where the other half is?" another said, leaning against the teenager's chair. The little boy frowned slightly. "You haven't been thinking about the consequences of your actions. Have you ever thought what will happen if both of them met?"

"…Shit."

"Tsk, Tama-chan," he sighed, standing up from the chair. "You're smart, but you never consider the consequences."

"That time…I was frustrated with Kami, so don't go blaming me for blindly tossing curses." he scoffed, crossing his arms. "Anyways, I'm quite sure that you can't fuse a human and a god together."

"Maybe," the lighter blonde sighed quietly. "However, if they do find a way to become one…"

"I'll just have to go to Earth and break them up," Tamaki said, his blue eyes glinting. He shrugged and started to count off on his fingers, "I may have to…separate them by force, cause trouble for this human, or I have to bully the god until he goes back to Heaven crying."

"Tama-chan, that won't work. There is a rule that an unearthly being couldn't return to Heaven, if he owes something," he said seriously. "And Kami-chan obviously owes something to the other half. However, if you're still thinking of intervening…"

"Of course, Honey-kun," he said, standing up from the chair. "This…Kaoru…will experience a lot of misfortunes just being with Hikaru." Tamaki craftily rubbed his hands together and snickered. "Prepare to stop all activities of killing people. It wouldn't hurt to let them live for a little while, would it?"

"Not necessarily, Tama-chan. However you need to talk to your advisor for that…"

"Honey-kun…"

"Yeah?"

"I'm going to have a small breather up on Earth, Tamaki said, spinning around towards the door. "Take care of stuff while I'm here. Oh, and don't tell _her_ where I went." He winked as he strolled off. The lighter blonde saluted him, smiled and then looked back up at the two screens that had both Kaoru and Hikaru standing there.

"But…they look quite happy." he added to himself.

* * *

"Hani-san!" the teenager said, blasting open the doors to the room where he was in. Honey whipped around in Tamaki's seat and looked at the girl questionably. The light haired brunette stormed inside, looking quite exasperated. "Where's Tamaki? I swear he wasn't anywhere else but the Control Room. Have you seen him?"

"Oh…Tama-chan?" Honey asked innocently, popping a chocolate truffle into his mouth. His brown eyes went to the ceiling as he remembered Tamaki's word to him about not telling his 'advisor'. He licked his chocolate coated fingers, and chirped, "Ah. He's on Earth."

"What?! At this time too?" she exclaimed. "Where the hell is he?"

"…I don't know," Honey truthfully said. He looked around guiltily and then held out his box, "Truffle, Renge-chan?"

"No, thanks," she murmured. Renge brushed a hand through her light brown tresses and walked up to the screen. She pressed several buttons and onto the screens came some cameras, and then her target figure.

"Ta…ma…ki…" she grumbled, fists clenching into fists. She whipped around and stormed out of the room saying, "Hani-san, watch the Control Room until I get that idiot level-headed!"

"He's still gonna be—"

SLAM

He ended in a sigh, "-­­­stupid you know."

* * *

--In the morning at Earth…

It was morning. The sun battered down through Kaoru's windows. It had been pouring the night before, and he swore he had a lack of sleep, and maybe lack of sleep caused him to be dreaming. Kaoru woke up and looked up at the ceiling.

Everything that he dreamed of…was just…a dream right? The teenager sat up in his bed, and looked around sleepily. Everything seemed like it was, just like before. Nothing changed at all. Kaoru sighed as he stood up from his bed, and he walked to his windows, and he thrust the curtains apart. The morning mist floated in, and he noted that there was some moisture on his window sill.

The thought of the supposed god, Hikaru, floated back into his mind and Kaoru shook his head.

'Can't be. That…imposter,' Kaoru reasoned in his head as he slowly walked towards the bathroom down his hall. He shut himself in and had place on his uniform, of an ugly shirt and black pants. When he opened the door, a delicious aroma floated in and Kaoru blinked.

Someone…was _cooking _in his house. Following his nose, he walked into the kitchen and almost yelled—

"YOU! I TOLD YOU TO GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!"

--never mind. The god whipped around with a pan in a hand and chopsticks in the other. "Yo! And good morning! How was your sleep?" he asked with a peppy voice as he prodded the frying egg onto a plate. "I hope you did have a good sleep! Oh! You overslept too! Don't worry, you won't be late, because I scheduled the bell to ring ten minutes later as part of its malfunction—"

"What the hell are you doing in my house?!"

"Cooking you breakfast!" he replied with a smile. Kaoru was grabbed by the shoulders and forced to sit down at his table with a large plateful of food in front of him. Hikaru placed a pair of chopsticks in front of him and grabbed a cup from the cupboards and filled it with apple juice. "Here!"

Kaoru stared at the towering pancakes and the puddle of maple syrup that dripped down from the top. A fried egg was perfectly fried and sprinkled with small bits of garlic powder. There was a small bowl of soup, and it was miso.

"Uh…" Kaoru was at loss for words. The wondrous smell floated to his nose as he stared at the food so deliciously prepared in front of him. He was astounded. These foods were the exact things that he liked to eat for breakfast. He hadn't told anyone what he liked to eat, and this stranger—this doppelganger could just cook it out of the blue.

"Eat! You're running late!" Hikaru tsked him, as he leaned against the table. Kaoru's hazel eyes wafted up to his image before snapping down to the food. "What? You don't like it? I'm pretty sure that you love these things for breakfast."

"Uhm…no," he said as he stared at the food. A small line of drool almost dripped from the corner of his lip. Kaoru hastily wiped it away, and murmured. "This…"

"Yeah?"

"Wait." Kaoru snapped to Hikaru, giving him a sharp stare. Hikaru didn't flinch, but only stared with questions mark popping out from his head. "You're still here!"

"Uhm yeah—"

Bzzzz—

Everything started to shake. Kaoru's eyes wandered about the room, trying to find the source. Strangely, everything was vibrating around him, but the silverware upon his plate didn't clash together and clink. "Eh? Earthquake—"

"Wait no!" Hikaru cried, immediately jumping into a battle stance. From hell knows where, the god grabbed a scepter from a fold of his white bleached robes, and for a while, Kaoru's eyes were blinded. As he blinked the light away from his hazel eyes, thunder cracked from the rod that Hikaru held, and he commanded in a bellowing voice:

"SHOW YOURSELF, YOU EVIL BITCH!"

_CRACK_

"HEY MY TABLE!!" Kaoru screamed; his eyes became wide as saucers. "DUDE, DON'T DESTROY MY HOUSE!!"

Screw the table. It disappeared as a circular chunk of his living room began to revolve down into the dark depths. Hikaru gasped, and he turned around hastily towards Kaoru, who was gaping at how his furniture disappeared down the hole—

"Kaoru! Hide! It's the advisor! The advisor! The blasted advisor! She'll blow your head off! She'll cut your throat! Whatever you do you must—" Hikaru rambled as he grabbed Kaoru's arm. He shoved the poor teenager into the storage closet and ran inside, tackling the human. "—HIDE!!"

And it turned pitch black; the rod in Hikaru's hand had ceased glowing.

"Hey…why the hell are you here? Aren't you supposed to be a 'god', so why don't you fight?" Kaoru asked, as Hikaru had his back towards him. The question seemed to make the supposed 'god' shiver, and Kaoru raised an eyebrow at him.

"B-Because…she's scary…"

"…what?"

The teenage-like person whipped around, a rabid look was plastered on his face and he rambled, "She's horrible!! Have you ever _seen_ how she looks like?! Sometimes I think I see snakes climbing out from her head--! AND I GET NIGHTMARES!!"

Kaoru's ear nearly blew off.

"She hisses at Tamaki too! I mean she dares defy and scare _Tamaki_!! Even that guy doesn't have the nerve to stand up to her! No one does!!" He brightened up a bit. "Well, except Kyouya—But she's a terribly frightening person…"

The Hitachiin was on the ground shaking, clutching his ear. His ear was tingling, and damn it hurts a lot!

The rumbling kept going, and then—

"HIKARU! I HAVE COME—" a loud echoing voice broke in through the storage. There was a strange and eerie silence as the intruder glanced around the empty living room. "H-Hey! Where'd you go?! Come on, Hikaru, we must deal out differences—"

WHAP

The door opened, and Hikaru's scared facade dropped, and he deadpanned. "Oh, Tamaki, it's just you."

"What do you mean it's just _me_!" the blonde countered, his hands rest on his hips. "It is I!" he sung, directing an elaborate hand gesture towards himself, "Tamaki. Your nemesis!"

Kaoru took the chance to peek at the person who was standing on an electric motor powered revolver platform. The teenager had blonde hair that sprayed onto his devilish yet innocent looking azure eyes. Like Hikaru, he was wearing an arrangement of clothes that weren't normally seen on the streets. Instead of lugging around robes and sashes, he wore something more modern…more…

"Are you wearing goth?" Kaoru interrupted rudely, pointing at the chains hanging from his black pants.

"Why of course—Who the--? He can see me!" Tamaki cried in dramatics, his glove-covered hands flew to his open mouth and he gaped.

There was silence, and his mind clicked.

'Ah. That's right; Kyouya gave him the ability to see spirits…' The blonde brushed his hands through his blonde hair and he adopted a suave smile. "I am the King of the Underworld, Tamaki, the handsome devil." He whipped out a black rose and presented it to Kaoru who stared at it, in disgust or wariness, he shan't know.

"Pleased to meet you, Kami's half."

"Er…what did you just call me?"

'Wups…my mouth slipped…' Tamaki thought, grinning nervously to himself. He patted his mouth a few times, and then he directed his gaze at Kami's half. "It is my duty to separate you and Kami. You, human, why are you in the presence of the most hated god?"

"I am not hated!" Hikaru cried, a vein pulsing on his head.

"You are hated!" he directed, giving a glare to the person wearing white. The blonde didn't feel like adding to the sentence, his extra words, 'In my world.'

"Are you going to take him away?!" Kaoru asked. Both spiritual beings spared a glance at the boy who spoke up suddenly. Without hesitating, the Hitachiin instantly grabbed Hikaru's robe by the collar and flung him at Tamaki.

"GAK!" both screamed, as Hikaru tripped over the raised platform.

"TAKE HIM! I DON'T WANT HIM!"

"What?!" Hikaru cried. He instantly fixed himself and turned around. "No, Kaoru! Don't turn against me!"

"Yes, this proves much easier than I thought!" the blonde smirked to himself. Having heard that, Hikaru's ear twitched and he launched himself onto the sin-tainted being. With his rod, he began striking Satan in the head. "Ah! Get off me!"

"You dare pick a fight with me?" Hikaru demanded with a voice filled with authority.

Kaoru rolled his eyes, and grabbed his bag from the counter. Kami, he didn't care what they were doing. Although his home being destroyed should be his first priority, he chose to go to school and escape this mayhem. He strolled right past the quarreling beings, and he waved his hand, "See you, I'm going off to school."

This made them pause in their fighting; Hikaru's rod was inches away from Tamaki's face, and Tamaki's fist was centimeters away from the god's head. Hikaru gave Tamaki a stink eye; he said bitterly, "I'll never let you get Kaoru."

"Hah, same here, sucker."

And the two raced off after the mortal, spiritual energy dust thingy flying after them as they ran.

* * *

"And you have the rest of the period to complete your test," the teacher finished, as she organized the papers on her desk. Kaoru was twitching. No, he was not twitching. He was absolutely _shaking_ in annoyance and irritation.

No, he wasn't pissed off at his teacher for penalizing him for being late even though the bell malfunctioned—

Well. He was. There were odd whisperings in the back of him. A strong aura tickled him, and he really had the feeling that someone was standing directly behind him, breathing over his shoulder, and watching his every move.

"Pst, Kaoru, are you _sure_ that that's the correct answer?"

He smacked himself in the face.

"Shut up, Hikaru," the other hissed, giving a punch to the other individual. Hikaru retaliated with a stink eye. "Let him be! Life isn't good if everything is perfect!"

"Oh yes it is!"

"No, it isn't!"

Kaoru silently fumed, as he pressed his palms into his forehead. He kneaded his aching head with his hands, as the 'Yes' and 'No' fight continued on with the two different beings behind him.

He tried to ignore them. Really! He did! Kaoru tried to shut off their annoying voices, Hikaru's prods about whether one question was right or wrong, and Tamaki's feeble attempts of trying to make the God shut up.

"Aw, shut up! Just because you lived here for more than a million years doesn't give you the right to boss me around!"

"Hey! I _created_ you, Tamaki!"

Tamaki scoffed, "Yes, you created me, yet I rebelled, and you can't blame yourself for being such a lonely guy." A smile (evil grin instead?) came on his face as Hikaru frowned. "No one enjoys your company, Kami!"

"No one enjoys _your_ company!"

"Psh! Everyone loves me!"

"Does not!"

"Does too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

SLAM.

Kaoru's head laid on the desk; creating silence between the god and the devil. Everyone in the class stared at Kaoru, who was mumbling obscene curses underneath his breath which made Hikaru cringe and Tamaki's face blushing with joy.

"My! That had to be the most beautiful thing that originated from Kami's half!" Tamaki exclaimed eloquently, and his hands clamped together and he sang. "Oh what beautiful words! They pierce my heart so!"

"Kaoru! HOW COULD YOU SAY SUCH THINGS?!" Hikaru howled into his robe sleeve. Kaoru blatantly ignored them, and he brought his hands to his ears, hoping that by doing that the voices would be blocked out. Much to his dismay, he still heard the God's sobs as clear as day. "My ears are deaf beyond recognition. I believe I cannot hear anymore!"

Kaoru's hand popped up weakly, and the teacher looked at him questionably. "Uhm…sensei…may I go to the infirmary? I don't feel so well…"

The teacher nodded, and said: "Okay, Hitachiin, please put your test here on my desk, and I'll have someone inform you about our class work when you return."

The teenager nodded wordlessly and stood up from his desk. His head was pounding tiredly; blast those two immature beings! Kaoru hoped that the two were too busy quarreling to even notice that he was leaving. He successfully made it to the door, and then—

"Hey! Kaoru! Where're you going?!"

He flinched, and quickly bolted out the classroom.

Clearly in his head, he heard the not so faint yells:

"Halt, you mortal human!"

He felt wind gushing from behind him, and a voice whispered tenderly in his ear, "Where are you going?"

"Away from you two, obviously," he growled under his breath. Something much darker floated onto his left, and he felt chills scramble down his spines. Something wrapped around his left foot and immediately he was anchored to the ground.

"Oh, you human, you can't run away from us," the voice crept into his ear. Kaoru shuddered, and he quickly looked down at his foot. Dark energy, that only he could see, swirled around his foot, climbing up to his thigh.

"Dammit," he swore. The energy formed a being, in a form of crouching, holding fast to his foot. The figure smiled innocently as more colorful words tumbled past Kaoru's lips; he had already begun to lose feeling in his leg.

"Kaoru!" the sudden call of his name, eased his tense leg muscles; the bonds that were once there broke suddenly, and he felt a warming hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"Tch, I almost had the human," Tamaki snapped, crossing his arms. Hikaru gave a glare, as his hands were set on Kaoru's shoulders. The devil shrugged and brushed a hand through his hair. "So much for trying to 'drag him to Hell' with me."

"Hell?! Never in such a place!"

"Heaven is equally disgusting, Hikaru!" Tamaki exclaimed. He wrapped his arms around himself and dark gloom formed around his very presence. "I sense a revolting aura everywhere I step in Heaven. Although our meetings are mandatory; I cannot think that Heaven can carry such blinding light! It mars my pale skin…"

"Screw your skin, Tamaki," Hikaru grumbled, as he pushed Kaoru towards the infirmary. "Heaven is a wonderful place, Tamaki. In the depths of hell all I see is dead people!"

"I resent that! Heaven has dead people too!"

"Well they're HAPPY dead people!"

Tamaki blew a spirited raspberry at Hikaru.

Hikaru stuck his tongue out as well.

Kaoru held his head and grumbled in his head, 'Two idiots haunt me…'

"I am by no means an idiot!" Tamaki exclaimed, his dramatic swinging of his arms almost whacked Hikaru against his head. There was a brief pause and Tamaki blinked. "Wups, my hand slipped."

"NO, IT DID NOT! YOUR LIES MAKE MY EARS BLEED."

"Kami, can we just go to the infirmary in peace?!" Kaoru demanded, breaking the two up from fighting. He shoved them aside before marching off down the empty hall.

Hikaru frowned at Kaoru's back and he glared at the devil standing next to him. "What is your purpose here on earth?"

Tamaki crossed his arms, and shifted on his legs slightly. "Why of course! You should have heard me when I made my awesome appearance!" Hikaru shot down his gesture by whacking his hand down. "I am here to separate you from that human!"

"But what's wrong with him?" he pestered. The blue-eyed teen stared at Hikaru slightly. Hikaru didn't know that Kaoru was his other half, and it was much safer to do so if the god himself didn't know anything about it.

Tamaki smiled to himself, before running down the hall and after Kaoru, "Well! I'm off to bring Kaoru to hell!"

"Wait! _No_!" Hikaru yelled in response, also breaking into a run after them.

From afar, Kaoru could hear the god and the devil.

"Kaoru! Come to the dark side! We have cookies!! YOU KNOW YOU WANT THEM!"

Kaoru stared.

"NO! DON'T FALL FOR IT!! HEAVEN HAS ALL THE PASTRIES IN THE—"

A vein popped.

"Shut up! I'm not going anywhere!"

* * *

A/N: Tamaki makes a scene! He's the devil, dun dun dun. Honey is his henchman. So yeah.

SHAMELESS ADVERTISING TIME! -Say hooray!-

_And for my shameless advertising! (You'll be seeing me put up the SAME thing, cus I'm lazy. -Hehehe...-_

_Anyways. Guys. I shall ask a really **big** favor from you. Can you guys click on my name, and read what is listed at the very top? There's a linky to a Ouran forum that I helped make, and it would completely make me happy if some people joined it and post regularly. There's a cool way of RPGing too! Canon characters can be played, and the way its organized it really awesome, so check it out please! It's not like I'm forcing you to join-- -COUGH**JOINDAMMIT**COUGH- So yeah! -innocent smile-_

_--End of Shameless ads._

I finally updated, so be happy. -Like a filler, but not really...-

Until Later...

--Demi-kun


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